Funny Excuses For Not Doing Homework
I was always a good, on-time, A-B student who always had his homework ready to present as the class bell rang. I can't remember a time I needed an excuse for not having it prepared. This page I'm saving for my grandkids if they ever need a really good excuse why their homework was not ready on time.
I was kidnapped by terrorists and they only just let me go, so I didn't have time to do it.
I didn't do it because I didn't want to add to my teacher's heavy workload.
A bunch of nerds stole it to make sure theirs were completely perfect.
We ran out of toilet paper at my house last night, and my Dad isn't feeling so good. He grabbed it in a big rush and I haven't seen it since.
My mother took it to have it framed.
It was in my back pocket and a pickpocket stole it.
I let somebody copy it but they never gave it back.
My mom's whooping cough vaccination wore off and we had to go to the hospital.
My skimpy printer ran out of ink.
I wasn't able to do my homework this weekend because when I went ice fishing, the heater inside of the tent got too close to the wall of the tent, starting it on fire. And when I ran out of there, I realized that my cat was still in there. My cat was in there because all the small fish that I catch, I just give to my cat. But when I went back for my cat, the fire was too hot. So I spent the weekend morning the loss of my cat.
"You said do questions 1-10. You didn't say bring them in."
My youngest daughter couldn't turn in her homework because her younger step-brother had stolen it, filled it in and turned it in to his teacher to prove how smart he was.
My house is being fumigated and I don't want to go in there and suffocate just to get it.
I left it in my shirt and my mother put the shirt in the wash.
I didn't do it because I spent all night doing the previous night's homework.
My Dad accidentally put it in his briefcase and took it to work.
My flash drive exploded.
The cleaning lady threw it away.
My brother stole it in a fit of sibling rivalry.
I felt like doing the whole book on the bus ride home, so I did -- but after the first 116 pages, I got bus-sick and puked all over the workbook and all my homework! What a coincidence, eh? So I started an extra credit report about World War I & II in my car going back home after dinner and, lo and behold!, my clumsy little siblings all felt carsick and hurled all over it and the World War library book (that'll explain the School Library fine). And it was already too late to start another one, so my mom wrote me a note excusing me for not bringing in my homework. I was looking at it on the bus when Billy (or whoever), who was sitting next to me, felt really sick and guess what happened?
I put it in the safe, but lost the combination.
My child’s locker is jammed and she can't get her homework out of it.
Some aliens from outer space borrowed it so they could study how the human brain worked.
Had to bail mom out of jail again.
A sudden wind blew it out of my hand and I never saw it again.
I have the mathematical proof, but there isn't room to write it in the margin.
The lights in our house went out, and I had to burn it to get enough light to see the fuse box.
I was in the lunch room and another student started criticizing you and I just couldn't let that go without letting him know he was wrong. I searched through my backpack to find something to throw at him, and all I could find was today's homework assignment, so I let him have it.
I thought the assignment was uninspiring. I read Moby Dick instead.
I got soap in my eyes and was blinded for the rest of the night.
Please excuse Jackie for not having her homework she was a little under the weatherman, and there was a big flurry in Central America.
I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy. It wasn't challenging enough.
Our dog has mistaken Reid’s homework for that GOSH DAMN newspaper.
I didn't do it, because I didn't want the other kids in the class to look bad.
I gave it to a homeless man to line his hat with.
My daughter couldn't turn in her homework because her dad had used it to start a fire in the wood stove.
A man came into my house last night and threatened to commit suicide. Well, it turns out he had a split-personality, so it was considered a hostage situation. It was a big commotion. Police, ambulance, everything! I can't believe you didn't hear about it! That's why I couldn't get my homework done.
A mad circus clown stole it on my bus stop and tried luring me into his house with it.
Aliens from outer space abducted my homework. They threatened me and said that if I didn’t give them my homework that I would be terminated.
"Sharon didn't do her homework because of her eyes.....She couldn't see any reason to do it."
My internet access was down (for emailed assignments).
I did my homework in my head, I didn’t know I was supposed to write it down. Then I forgot. Next time should I show my work?
I left it at Mom's house when she took me back to Dad's house.
I did do it all, but before I got a chance to save, my book crashed and I lost it all.
I loaned it to a friend, but he moved away.
I left it in my locker with last week's assignment.
"I left it on your desk last Friday but its just not here and it was handwritten so I can't print it off again, took me ages!"
I left it in a hymn book in the choir loft, having used it to mark my solo.
I gave it to the substitute.
My printer broke and my disk is corrupted. Unfortunately my computer crashed this morning as well.
I left my homework on my desk at home. My dog got ahold of it and slobbered all over it. I didn’t want to bring it in with all those dog germs.
I dropped it in the toilet accidentally and it got flushed.
I have radon poisoning.
My notebook got stolen in the school cafeteria and it had all my work in it.
There's a virus in my printer.
"Joe don't have his homework because our family just got a new paper shredder, and I just had to test it out, and I accidentally shredded Joe’s homework."
My father had a nervous breakdown and he cut it up to make paper dolls.
Another student fell in a lake, and I jumped in to rescue him but unfortunately my homework drowned.
We had no food in the house. I can’t do homework on an empty stomach. Can you?
I left it in the back of the truck when we went deer hunting. One of the textbook's word problems offended me. I'm not supporting them by doing any more of their problems.
Please excuse my son for doing so poorly on the test. The hour he puts aside to do homework and studying every week was lost when the clocks "sprung forward" over the weekend.
I was at a rally last night.
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A Creative Example
This excuse is especially useful in less populated sections of the country, but variations of it will work anywhere. It's called the Hiker's Dilemma and goes as follows:
You won't believe what happened (your teacher will undoubtedly agree with your opening statement). I was at the library writing my essay on The Declaration of Independence and I got so involved in it that I lost track of time and missed the bus. I stopped off for a bite to eat at Montezuma's cafe and called my Mom for a ride home. She was unable to come, on account of her lupus (the goal is to create sympathy; any disease will do), so I decided to make the long trek home...through the woods. After about an hour of walking and reciting our nation's founding document, Montezuma got his revenge on my stomach. I had no choice but to run behind a bush and squat. I averted one disaster, but my troubles weren't over. I had no toilet paper. I searched through my backpack and all I could find was my essay that I had just written. I struggled for over eight minutes, not knowing what to do. I finally decided to sacrifice the essay. I have it in my locker if you want me to get it. It's pretty disgusting though.........